Archive for May, 2009

1 day left

“That Internet thing is useless.”  –My dad, who has been searching for the theme to an old PBS show (“The Photographic Vision”) for months now, as he wanted to have it for our dance at the wedding.

We’re finishing up the last few things now. I’m going to go out and get some things while C sleeps off his first 22-mile bike ride….Yesterday we took the Prairie Path out to Wheaton, about 10 miles, and then came back. I think the most he’s ridden recently is about 10 or 12 miles, so it was a big jump for him. For my part, I was surprised to discover that I was not worn out by the ride, since last time I did that (last fall), I had to really push myself the last few miles. Guess that weightlifting paid off! You wouldn’t think, looking at me, that I’m in better shape than I was in high school (when I was 45 pounds lighter), but I must be.

Pardon my digression….I have a list of things to do and get, including a nose pad for my glasses to replace the one that fell off on the ride yesterday, also soda (now C’s brother is getting that), wine cups and plastic champagne cups….

I keep remembering Things That Need To Get Done and writing them down (or forgetting them again). It makes me wonder what I’m forgetting and not remembering. And my hair…my hair vexes me. I had a vision for my hair which will never in a million years come to pass…though as I’ve been writing this and doing other things, I think I’ve figured something out that will work, and I just need to get some pretty hair clips and/or figure out some way to clip a flower in with the clips I have…

Anyway. Shit has got to get done.


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Heeeeeeeeeeeere weeeeeee go!

3 days till the wedding! And my last day of work for almost a month. I can’t wait for the road trip! We got a GPS and a car inverter (converts the car power outlet to house outlets) as some of our gifts, and since they were delivered to his parents’ house (his parents, unlike my family and the wedding, are local), we went ahead and found them so we can have them on our honeymoon. We haven’t tried out the inverter (thanks Mike!) yet, but the GPS is just what I hoped it would be when I registered for it (thank you Vogels!). It has a bicycle mode, so we can take it with us when we go out on our bikes, too. And it’ll allow us to find Gold’s Gyms, for which we have travel passes, and service stations in the desert, and the diners listed in the four or five books we’ve been given, and yarn stores (I hope), and other interesting things.

I will try and update this site every day or two or three, and hopefully I’ll remember to give out the address to friends and family, since I think I haven’t really done that much since it was only going to be a cycling blog….

Accuweather says it’ll be a beautiful day this Saturday, with a high of 74°F and mostly sunny (some clouds and a tiny chance of a short storm). Hopefully it won’t be humid like it’s been this past week, where you get into bed after having a fan pulling air in through the bedroom windows and discover the sheets are damp — and by damp I mean actually wet, not just a little sticky. Ugh. I worry about my guitar…I may ask C’s mom if I can bring it over to their house as they usually have the a/c on. And they have central air, unlike our dinky college apartment, where the window unit makes a small part of the apartment very cold and leaves the rest like nothing’s happening, all the while sucking electricity like…


I’m terrible at metaphors — I’m too literally-minded. “Like an out-of-shape runner gasping for air” is the best I can think of. It uses a lot of electricity. Double the bill for a few days of a/c — seriously, it’s that bad. We have four computers, but the a/c doubles the bill when used only for a few days?

The desert will be a relief after the last week of swimming through the air. I visited my aunt and uncle in Arizona years ago, and one day we went shopping downtown. It was gorgeous out, a little warm but with a nice breeze going by every so often, but after a while of wandering about outside, my aunt started to try and steer me into the shade before I made myself sick. I was surprised — “are you kidding me, it’s like 80 degrees out” — and she said “It’s a hundred and ten, get in the shade!” (In my defense, I had never experienced desert before.)

I wonder how many Midwesterners get heat- or sunstroke when they go to Arizona for the first time? “Let’s go for a walk, it’s beautiful! Man, I thought it was supposed to be hot here!” *walks about in the sun, falls over*

On that same note, we’re having the power steering leak in the van fixed before we go through the desert on the old Route 66, where service stations can be 100 miles apart. I’d rather spend the money now to get it fixed (with the shop aware that we’ll be traveling through the desert) than attempt to ride as much as 50 miles on a bicycle in the desert, especially considering that, in 75 degrees here in the green Midwest, the best I can do is about 25 miles. But if we do break down close enough to a service station, it’ll be nice to be able to ride for help if necessary. (Gotta put water bottles on the to-pack list.)

Okok. Back to work.

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  • Oregano seeds are tiny.
  • Seed packets contain a lot of seeds.
  • I need more tiny ziploc bags.
  • I’m still going to have a lot of leftover seeds.
  • A Sharpie writes on ziploc bags, though you need to give it a moment to dry or it will smudge.
  • Parsley seeds are cute. (So are tiny ziploc bags, but I knew that already.)
  • Procrastination is the devil.
  • I will probably never figure out for certain whether changing my name is the “right” thing to do.

That last one requires explanation.

I agree with C’s opinion, expressed years ago, that “a family should all have the same name.” I also think that hyphenating is only putting off the problem, and it makes things more difficult in the meantime (also, who hyphenates? The woman. Why bother? How is that different from just taking his name?). Because of past events in his family, his father would probably not be happy with him changing his name; also, he’s the one who’s going to have the career and nobody expects a man to change his name, so he probably shouldn’t (granted he’s only in grad school, but he is in grad school and already networking). What reasons do I have not to change my name? It’s tradition from when women were considered property.

Granted, that’s a big one. But what we have today is the freedom to choose, and if what we’re really trying to do is to make things even, I shouldn’t consider past gender roles in my decision. What matters is what’s in my life. And what’s in my life is a few reasons for him not to change his name, none for me not to, and a combination of [family = same name] + [him not changing his name] which leads to me changing mine.

I’ve thought this through before; I’ve talked about it before with other people; I’ve gone over it with a fine-toothed comb. But I’m still not sure, and I don’t think I ever will be.

What’s in the way is emotion. I’m not a Vulcan (on an unrelated note, I liked that movie and fuck anybody who says different), but when I make decisions based purely on emotion, I fuck myself over. Every damn time. I’m not just marrying C because I love him and he loves me; I’m also marrying him because he is good, intelligent, patient, kind, gentle, strong, and sweet; because we have a good relationship; and because we look in the same direction and make judgments and decisions based on similar criteria (which is why we have a good relationship), something I never considered necessary for a good relationship before this one because I was naive and stupid and didn’t know what a good relationship looked like.

Anyway, I like my name. That’s it. That’s the big deal. Nobody ever spells it right; nobody’s ever heard of it. It’s a surprise to everyone who asks. My first and last names together make me a completely unusual person, and I like it that way. Sure, I use my middle name at restaurants because I don’t feel like spelling out my first name for the sixty bajillionth time, but I can’t imagine googling my name and finding people who aren’t me. But there’s one who has done work for NPR, can you believe that? She even spells it with two Ns.

I started listening to that story and I twitched when I heard MY NAME. Because it’s MINE, dammit. Even if it’s not yet.

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Did I not say there would be a lot of these?

Seeing as I can’t keep my interest on one thing for very long at all, I’m making this into just a personal blog. Currently knitting is kind of taking over the bicycling, and strength training is sitting idly in the background, only to come out once a day. Not much to say on that topic, except I now have muscles starting to show through my fat and damn, do I have some nice calves. Seriously. I like watching the muscles twitch when working them on the inclined leg press machine.

Speaking of which, two days ago I put three 45s on each side of that machine, 20 pounds more than I’ve ever done. Check me out! I’m now up to 110 or 120 on lateral pulldowns (I can’t quite get 120 all the way down; my muscles just won’t do it), 85 on bench press (won’t be long till I can say “suck it, skinny bitches, I CAN BENCH YOU” without them having to be 4’8″ and anorexic) and 30 pounds each side for dumbbell chest press (though I think I could have done more), 25 on bicep curls, 115 on squats, and 2 20-pound dumbbells for lunges (I am rapidly moving from “hate lunges” to “loathe lunges”). C signed up at the gym last week and the other day discovered that his muscles have been lying to him about the amount of weight he can lift. I like watching him. 🙂

I haven’t lost a single pound, but since I gained a few (up to 175) in the first two weeks when I was at a client site for work and eating out every meal, I haven’t gained more. That’s gotta mean something, right? >_>

It’s so weird how I feel almost sexy now when I’m not in the gym, but I set foot in there and suddenly I feel like a fat slob. Might be the clothes, though, because my workout clothes are not exactly flattering. At least, that’s the thought I’m comforting myself with. That, and if anybody smirks at me, I can say “hey, at least I’m here.”

If I could just get rid of my stomach fat… God I hate doing abs (note: just exercising abs does not get rid of the fat on them, though fat on well-worked muscle looks slightly better than fat on unused muscle — depending on how much fat there is). Except for that one exercise where you lay flat on a bench, hold onto it by your head for leverage, hold your legs out horizontally, raise them to vertical, and then try to touch the ceiling with your toes. To work the obliques, twist your legs during the last part. I like that exercise.

Gear switch! Knitting! I have a few projects on the needles, some of which I’ve taken off (putting them onto a piece of yarn to hold the stitches) to use for the project that I have finished. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that I designed it, but I didn’t use a pattern, just cast on the number of stitches I thought I’d need and started knitting. It turned out cute, and now I have a little chenille drawstring bag to put my wallet, phone, and keys in during the wedding so they’re all in one (fuzzy, soft, pretty) place.

Other projects I have started:

  • What was supposed to be a scarf for C but is way too wide (I wanted it wide, but not that wide!). I’m going to find a complimentary color or two, knit several of these way-too-wide scarves, and stitch them together into a blanket. In the meantime, I’ll start a new scarf for him which will actually be a scarf.
  • The first attempt at the chenille handbag, which ended up way too big (I suspect a pattern here, no pun intended) and will need to be partially frogged in order to become anything useful — when I went to the next skein of yarn, suddenly my gauge went to shit and it’s completely fucked now. I’ll probably try to make it a knitting bag, but I may just give it away if somebody says they like it. I’m irritated with it.
  • A second garter stitch scarf with purple so-called “homespun” yarn (it’s from Meijer so I seriously doubt it was actually home-spun, it’s just made to look like homespun). This is on big needles (size 13 for the curious) and I’m knitting it loosely so it’s holey. I really like how it’s turned out, but I don’t know if I’m going to hold onto it.

Future projects:

  • Little gifts for everybody helping out with the wedding. I’d like to try and make more of the drawstring bag that I finished, but I’m not sure if I can make it the way I want to with the needles I have. Anyway, they’d probably just end up in people’s closets. I’d like to try my hand at soap sacks. There are other things I have in mind too but I can’t remember exactly what at the moment.
  • A dice bag for a friend who commented on the color of my 2nd garter stitch scarf (the “homespun” purple one). Apparently that yarn is the same color as some dice that he has. I asked him if he wanted a dice bag and he ducked his head a little and said yes. I’m not sure how I’m going to make a dice bag out of that yarn, because I don’t know how well it’ll work with the small needles I’ll need to use to make it hold dice, but we’ll see.
  • A dice bag for C.
  • There’s a stitch in my new stitch dictionary that’s a star of David. I’d like to make a scarf with that stitch pattern for a “holiday” gift for a Jewish friend.
  • Other Christmas gifts for friends and family. I need to find out favorite colors and such.
  • Catnip mice for my cat.
  • A lace “overskirt” for my white skirt which I don’t wear much because I’m afraid of getting it dirty.
  • Other lace skirts, maybe.
  • A lace shawl. I have some crochet thread for this, and I might do it as a learn-crochet project if I get adventurous.
  • More drawstring bags like the one I completed, only more like what I intended.
  • Hats with the same pattern as the drawstring bag, only with increases instead of decreases so that it, y’know, is a hat instead of a bag.

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